Where is Ben Oxleys Wife Melissa Oxley Now?

May 2024 · 3 minute read

NBC News’ ‘Dateline: While They Were Sleeping’ focuses on the tragic death of Benjamin “Ben” Oxley in February 2008. The loving father lived with his family in Nevada at the time of the incident, and his wife, Melissa Oxley, was right beside him, sleeping when it happened. While the authorities initially suspected her, there was more to the story, with the road leading to Ben’s ex-wife. So, if you’re wondering where Melissa might be today, we’ve got you covered.

Who is Melissa Oxley?

Melissa and Ben Oxley seemed to lead a perfect life, living in Minden, Nevada. They married in September 2006 and were committed to raising Alyssa, the latter’s daughter from a previous marriage. At the time of the incident, Craig, Melissa’s young brother, was also living with them. However, it all came crashing down for the Oxleys during the early hours of February 21, 2008.

Melissa later said in court, “I remember hearing a noise. My ears were ringing; I thought I was dreaming. I smelled gun smoke. I tried to wake Ben. I nudged him and said, ‘Honey, there’s something to check on.'” Although, when Ben didn’t respond, she walked out of the bedroom only to see the front door open. Once Melissa returned, she discovered the horror: her husband was shot in the head.

At that point, Melissa rushed to Alyssa’s room and called 911, with the authorities arriving shortly after 3:30 AM. After the police saw no signs of a break-in and found weapons in the house, they questioned her and Craig. At that point, Melissa remembered being very numb at first and overwhelmed; in the following months, the police kept an eye on her.

Melissa had received a $400,000 life insurance payout after Ben’s death and had started dating other men. Albeit, the investigation revealed that she never asked about the insurance money. Furthermore, regarding her dating, Melissa said she only hoped to have an everyday life and wanted to move on. Eventually, her fear of being seen as a killer disappeared after being ruled out as a suspect. As time passed, the authorities learned that James Matlean, the boyfriend of Ben’s ex-wife, Dawn Oxley, was the killer.

Witness statements revealed that James and Dawn discussed killing Ben to regain custody of Alyssa. Besides, he later confessed to the murder but claimed Dawn was the mastermind. Nevertheless, she had already received immunity for her testimony against him. The killer’s identity shocked Melissa, who said, “He lived with her for over 19 months afterward. I saw him numerous times. He’d pick her up from my house for visitations together.”

Where is Melissa Oxley Today?

Despite the tragedy, Melissa was determined to move on. Moreover, she wanted to deal with the situation with compassion, which she urged Alyssa to do as well. In a May 2012 interview with Today, Melissa said, “I always told her, pretty much from day one, whenever we found out who did this, we’d have to be able to forgive them at some point in order to go on. I know it’s such a big part to be able to move on and not be so angry and held back by it.”

Melissa added, “We still have to live our lives, so I thought it was super important for her to be able to go on with hers too.” Today, she is doing much better; she previously studied at Western Nevada College and currently works at Kahle Community Center in Stateline, Nevada. On the personal front, Melissa re-married in February 2021 and lives in Gardnerville, Nevada, with her husband, David Allmett.

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